Chapter 14 Philosophy 1 - from my book Changes

My Philosophy 1 class between meditations. Faces blocked out for people’s privacy. My face is circled.

Chapter 14

Philosophy 1

In the Philosophy 1 class, Tom immerses his students in the subconscious, force and spirit worlds through meditation.  This is done to overbalance us into the unseen and eternal for a week, so we can begin to feel a balance between both the physical world and the spiritual realms.

I had a lot of questions going into the Philosophy classes at Trackerschool.  Probably my biggest question was how to  understand why I felt so helpless and hopeless and stuck in my life.  What was missing?  I felt like a cripple when it came to dealing with the challenges in my life.

I was hoping to find some strength within me.

The other reason I wanted to learn more about the philosophy of Grandfather Stalking Wolf was to educate myself about the worlds within worlds that Tom Brown Jr. talked about in his books.

Being raised a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, also referred to as the Mormon church, I already had a strong belief in the unseen and eternal.  I had been taught that the spiritual world was here with us and all around us.  I had been taught that we lived as spirits before being born and would continue to live as spirits, and eventually be resurrected into a physical body, after we die.  I was raised to view the mortal life we lead in the physical world to be a temporary period of time for us to gain experience, knowledge, and wisdom about all things physical.

In reading Tom’s books, I saw an easy overlap between Grandfather’s philosophy and the teachings I was brought up with.  To say I was curious to know more would be an understatement.

In my life I had had spiritual experiences that taught me that the world of spirit is real.  For example, I have heard my name spoken out loud a couple times, when no one was around.

Having heard the story of Samuel in the Bible, I answered, “I hear you, Lord, what do you want?.”

I did not get a response, but I felt a sweet comfort that I was not alone.

Another time I was lying in my bed, curled up on my side, crying my eyes out over a boy that broke up with me.  I was facing away from the bedroom door and I felt my mother sit on the bed behind me and place her arm on mine to comfort me.  When I turned to talk to her, there was no one there.

At that point I thought that maybe it was my mother’s mother, who I loved very much but who had passed away.  I don’t know if it was her or another spiritual comforter, but I felt the comfort of a loving being there with me.

I never doubted the existence of God, or that life goes on before and after our mortal life; not only because of what I had been taught but because to think otherwise didn’t compute in my brain.  If this physical life were all there was, I would wonder … why … what’s the purpose?

As one of my other teachers, Malcolm Ringwalt, said, we are meaning making machines.  I find that to be true.

Philosophy 1 class was not held at the primitive camp like the Standard class was.  Phil 1 was held at the Joseph A Citta Scout Reservation in New Jersey.  During Phil 1 the lecture hall looked like a huge slumber party because during this first week of philosophy training, we did our meditations laying down on our sleeping bags, with out eyes shut, in order to remove all distractions.

I had an idea of what Phil 1 would be like because Tom describes Philosophy 1 in his book Awakening Spirits, although he doesn’t go into detail about any of the meditations other than the journey the medicine place.

Although I sort of knew what to expect, these meditations were a little bit scary to me because I was very cautious when it came to things of the spirit.  I addressed my fear by praying before each meditation.  I asked that I wouldn’t be able to do anything that I wasn’t supposed to do.  I still didn’t completely trust this process Tom was introducing us to.

Right from the beginning, the first time Tom led us in meditation to our medicine places, I was happy that the Lion was there, waiting for me, and went everywhere with me, so I felt completely safe.